If I Only Had a Brain

To quote MC 900 Ft. Jesus, “Suppose I accidentally got my shit together. Would I get a medal or a pat on the back and a little feather I could stick in my cap or pin to my shirt . . .” Nearly 5 months ago I made a non-New Year’s resolution that I was seriously going to get it together. I … Continue reading


It’s been 3.5 months since I blogged. I guess that whole getting better at blogging thing didn’t really work out for me. So here it is, January 1 and I am resolving to try again. Sorry, I know new year’s resolutions are the worst. At least if I fail horribly I won’t be any different … Continue reading

Girl, what happened to your face?

First, I’d like to thank the LA city bus driver for taking a chance on an unknown kid. No, wait, that was Travis Birkenstock. I’d like to thank Letty Spaghetti (I just came up with that. You’re welcome.) for posting today and reminding me that I needed to tell the story of my face. “Uh, … Continue reading

Say “Cheese!”

So, I feel like talking about cheese.  And some other stuff. But first, cheese. Why cheese? I dunno, because it’s AWESOME! And because I have mostly abstained for the past few weeks. (Thanks for nothing, sinus infection. You can suck it big time.) As someone who cannot live long-term without cheese, aka: reasons I’ll never … Continue reading

More Trauma for Yo’ Mama

The universe knew I needed more fodder for the blog, so it lashed out at me this morning in the form of a belt buckle. Why yes, I *did* step on it & puncture a hole in my foot. And yes, it hurt. A lot. Thanks for asking. The kicker? It was my State Seal … Continue reading

It’s the Blogpocalypse!

The blogpocalypse must be nigh; here I am writing a post, after 8 months of radio silence. Things have happened since T-Gives 2012 but I guess none of it felt super bloggable. But I was thinking about my blog, and even got sucked into re-reading all my old posts when something SUPER EMBARRASSING HAPPENED! I’ll … Continue reading

Giving Thanks

It’s the day before T-Gives, so I’ll start off with a tiny list of things I’m thankful for. I’m obviously thankful for friends, family, and not being dead. I am also thankful for these things: A really low electric bill. The bright side of being unemployed is I don’t get stuck working late, skipping lunch, … Continue reading

The Saga Continues

The saga continues. Not the Twilight Saga, because that’s over now. The saga that is my life. ***INTERRUPTION*** I just saw a commercial for some Vegas-y thing where they spoke the lyrics to “Bohemian Rhapsody.” It was simultaneously fascinating and horrifying. Please don’t ever make me watch this again. ***OKAY, BACK TO NORMAL TALK*** Where … Continue reading

The Day Aftermath

Yesterday was a big day. Even though I have a CA driver license and have registered my car here, voting made me really feel like a California citizen. I just wish it hadn’t been sullied by so much public ugliness. And that the CA public hadn’t been successfully confused by the No on Prop 37 … Continue reading

Church and Stuff

I went to church today. Before you get too confused, I should explain that my church is Barneys CoOp. I’ve been a wayward parishioner as of late what with the no-job having and all. But also because my first few visits went totally unnoticed by local staff. Bummer alert. I love my Austin CoOp so … Continue reading